i. Getting so high at school i couldn’t even speak and then passing out in the bathroom. I did it because a boy told me drugs would make me feel alive.
ii. Inhaled cigarette smoke as if it was an angels breath. I did it because a boy told me smoking would make me relaxed.
ii. Drank a lot of Smirnoff out of plastic water bottles at school even though it burned my throat and gave me headache. I did it because a boy told me drinking would cure my shyness.
iii. Skipped too much school to go downtown and sit outside the mall and smoke. I did it because a boy told me school wasn’t worth my time.
iv. Cut my skin open to see the perfect contrast of crimson red against my pale translucent skin. Even though it hurt to walk the next day. I did it because a boy told me cutting would help me solve my problems.
v. Let strange older guys touch me and whisper “baby” in my ear over and over again until they were finished and would let me leave. I did it because a boy told me that fucking strange men was how you fix your emptiness.
vi. Let you leave your mark of perfectly lined up purple bruises along my body. I did it because you told me that this was love."
This is very true. People just don’t understand. #depression #depressed #sad #tired #insomnia #insomniac #suicide #suicidal #anxiety #anorexic #anorexia #bulimia #bulimic #purge #selfharm #cutting #cuts #cutter #lonely #alone #broken
To all the people who tell me to get over myself, that I’m stuck on the pity train. You clearly didn’t almost get your masters in psychology if you’re a forty something year old woman who says that to a twenty year old who wants to kill herself over your jerk of a son. I didn’t choose to be this way anymore than she chooses to breathe.